This fall marks the 9th year that my husband JT and I have been full-time entrepreneurs thanks to the network marketing/direct sales industry. We’ve had a crazy roller coaster ride marked with some of the lowest points of our lives and some of the best.

Like most dedicated entrepreneurs, we were not unfamiliar to struggle in our 9 years as we learned more about ourselves, got rejected more often than ever before, all while going through bankruptcy, losing 2 cars, 2 houses and most heart-breakingly, our dignity and sense of self-worth.

Hopefully you haven’t had to experience that kind of financial loss and devastation… but if you’re a network marketer or just starting out, you’ll experience some of the other struggles like rejection and family and friends turning their backs on you and your dreams.

But here’s the thing… you don’t have have to for much longer… JT and I could’ve used this information 9 years ago when we were just starting out.. but we wouldn’t trade our journey for the world because…

The silver lining is actually golden.

Over the 9 years, we learned more about ourselves than we ever could in the U.S. Navy (JT was my pilot and I was his navigator… yes, true love story :), we had more time to spend actually raising our children (ourselves instead of putting them in daycare or hiring a nanny), traveled the world and met some incredible people… not to mention the financial gain.

No matter the negativity and rejection we felt, it’s amazing what can happen when you truly believe in what you do… when you have the tenacity, fortitude and leadership to make this business your profession and not just a fly by night hobby.

Take it from me. The realization of a better life for you, your family and your future is worth it all.

Now we live in a place we love surrounded by people we enjoy. We eat healthy everyday by choice and provide everything our kids require from sports to recreation. And most importantly to us, we have the time freedom to build our business when and where in the world we want to.

But our journey here has not been without many “lessons learned” including stepping out of our comfort zone and doing exactly what our upline told us to do in order to build our business.

We made the lists, approached friends and family, held the parties… we did it all and failed miserably. Thankfully our family and friends saw it all as temporary insanity and have since forgiven us (and hopefully forgotten 🙂

In fact, what we did for many years didn’t work for us.. we didn’t feel authentic doing it.. until we found a better way… (I’ll share more on that in a bit.)

We were far from perfect. In fact, if you are like us, you may have done any number of these:

• Have you ever invited your friends and family over only to break out the company’s presentation and awkwardly try to convert your unsuspecting guests into business builders? We have.
• Have you ever tried to prospect your car salesperson, your banker, or “anyone who fogs a mirror” only to be asked, “Is this Network marketing?” or worse… “Is this one of those ponzi schemes?” (Ugh…my mother hit me with that one!!) We have.
• Have you ever messaged someone on facebook with a long drawn out explanation on how excited you are about this new “ground floor” opportunity that they’d be crazy not to join now? We definitely have.

I’m got plenty more blunders, but I’m actually getting down in the mouth just thinking of them all. LOL

The point is to not point fingers, but to share the fact that JT and I have made our fair share of mistakes along the way.

It’s actually pretty depressing to think that all our mistakes came out of a genuine desire to want to help others… I just didn’t know how to do it right back then…

But just because most network marketers and direct sales marketers are like us, genuine people with the desire to help others, doesn’t mean they get off the hook and aren’t held accountable for their actions.

You see, the people who are doing this type of prospecting online aren’t building their businesses, they’re actually destroying their own reputations and the reputation of network marketers around the world…

That’s a pretty bold statement, but I’m willing to back it up.

Most Network marketers have been taught the wrong way to prospect online…

You see, there is a fine line between prospecting and spamming…

Let’s first address the word spam because I think most people overlook their actions and don’t categorize themselves as a spammer because their “intentions” are in the right place ( I know we did).

The definition of spam

irrelevant or inappropriate messages sent on the Internet to a large number of recipients.

send the same message indiscriminately to (large numbers of recipients) on the Internet.

Most network marketers fall into this category of spamming and sending “irrelevant” or “inappropriate” messages to as many people as they know and to people they don’t know.

I’ve received recently some real-life examples of the WRONG way to do it from people I haven’t spoken to in over 6 years (the 1st one) or never spoke to at all (the 2nd)l:

Here’s the thing about spam… it’s all about quantity… not about quality.

And here’s the worst part.. it’s all about YOU…

Successful entrepreneurs and network marketers know that relationships take time to form and can be ruined in one bad encounter.

And the thing about relationships is that they are about “we” meaning there are two people relating.

You may be saying, “yeah, but Mia, I don’t have a lot of time to build realtionships…”

That is true for many network marketers (like me) and that’s why they’re turning to the internet.

Yes, relationships take time to build… but with the internet, it can be faster than ever… and more personable than ever… and a lot can be automated.

But it starts with caring.

Caring enough to share what is working for them without an agenda. Caring to show others the way and give value without expectation of something in return. Caring to be authentic and be someone who can uniquely solve someone else’s problems.

Being you-niquely you and adding value to someone else who has a problem is one of the quickest ways to build rapport and the begin a relationship.

Do this over time and your business will absolutely grow… and not just linearly, but exponentially.

Anyone can cut and paste a message into FB messenger or hire someone from the Philippines for cheap to do it for them.

What gets people to notice you is not your product or opportunity or ground floor opportunity, it’s the genuine desire to care… through your actions.

Skilled online marketers know that putting in the time to build relationships online is a skill just like building their business offline.

Online prospecting is not easy, but it can be mastered if you know how to do it right.

If you’re still fuzzy on whether or not you spam instead of prospect, read on…

Top 3 ways to know if you’re spamming others

1. You private message friends, family or complete strangers on social media with a link to join your opportunity.
2. You get reported as a spammer to Facebook because of your message or you get angry 4 letter words as replies.
3. You go to other people’s posts, groups communities of “like minded” people and post links to your opportunity or website in the comments section.

In addition to these 3 things… you can actually be seen as a spammer at networking events if you…

1. Compulsively talk about your company or products, without anyone asking you to share.
2. Or you engage in interactions online or offline with a hidden agenda, hoping to transition the topic to something that would get people interested in your opportunity, without caring about knowing the other person.

This last one is so important because it is the foundation of why most network marketers get discouraged and never become successful.

People can feel your agenda… they can feel if you don’t care about them… and they run!! The other way!!

When we stopped prospecting and started attracting people, our business boomed.

Yes, there is a massive difference between prospecting and attracting. The difference is when you’re prospecting, you’re chasing and when you’re attracting, you’re the one being chased.

What an incredible shift.

To have people contacting you, seeking you, wanting to know about what you’re doing before you even share any part of your opportunity with them, that’s power.

To not have a hidden agenda whenever you are talking to a family, friend, acquaintance or new friend, that’s freedom.

To feel like you can be present again and just have a normal conversation, that’s relieving!! Freedom to be yourself!!

You may be asking… then how do I build my business if I stop prospecting?

Leverage Your Time Online Rather Than 1-on-1 Prospecting With An Agenda

Now prospecting and spamming may work for some people… and I’m not here to make them wrong, but I know what feels right to me… and that’s attracting people rather than prospecting.

With the help of some mentors, I found an online recruiting strategy… that works!

Having an online recruiting strategy, I’m able to passively build my business with a lead flow that converts easily into customers all while spending time with family and friends doing the things I love to do.

Instead of spending hours spamming or private messaging, inviting people to my house (having to clean my house or prepare snacks, etc Yuck!!), I learned how to harness Facebook’s reach to help me attract more people who are interested in what I have, all using their ad platform (and it can be done on a shoe-string budget too which is how we started!)

I alluded to it before, but the strategy is called “attraction marketing” and it is designed specifically for network marketers and people selling top-tier direct sales products.

Because despite what other gurus may say, if you’re business is dependent on you “putting yourself out there” meaning private messaging strangers or long lost friends, spamming on social media posts, or even buying cold leads, etc. then you’re NOT really marketing, you’re spamming… despite your true “intentions”.

Prospecting online and internet marketing are NOT the same thing!

Prospecting is actively seeking people… Internet marketing is a more passive strategy which, when used with attraction marketing actually works… even when you’re not actively taking action.

If you want to learn how it works, I reveal the entire strategy we use in a free 10 day online recruiting boot camp available here.

You’ll also get more information on a book that will go into depth on the attraction recruiting and selling formula.

If you’re sick of trying to build your business online, and what your upline tells you to do isn’t working for you, then you’re going to want to go through this 10 day bootcamp.

The alternative is to keep cold calling leads, buying lists, chasing away your warm market and prospecting with a cold market thinking it’s about numbers, then this passive strategy isn’t for you.

It’s not for me to tell you what feels authentic to you. I just know what has worked for us, and what feels better while living the lifestyle that is important to us.

I’ve never been a fan of chasing people.. I’d much rather they self-select out if they aren’t right for what I have to offer.

And that leaves the people who are REALLY interested in what I have to offer.

So if that’s you, then click here for more information about our FREE online recruiting bootcamp.

To your success,
Mia